Thursday, June 25, 2009

He loves me!

It may be TMI but its my blog, so get over it!
Oh and its going to be a long, rambling post. I deserve that every once in a while, right?

First of all, my husband totally loves me.

Second of all, today was a crappy day!

but I am going to blog in the reverse order. save the best for last

Last night at 1:30 (or I guess that was this morning) I decided to go out in the family room because Jack was screaming with some gas and Shawn and I figured if he got some sleep, he could wake up with the kids and let me sleep in. Between Jack and thinking about Susan (read here if you don't know what I am talking about) I didn't sleep at all! Well around 4:30am, I was still on the couch with a fussy baby and Shawn gets a call and has to go to work. Ahhh, that's definitely not a good start to the day. Not the working thing, the no-sleep thing.

Then I had a melt-down getting ready. I know its only been 3 weeks and I shouldn't be fretting but none of my clothes fit! Everything is too tight, nothing looks or feels good or right. And I have tons of grey hair!! (random... I know) Plus we have no no money to buy any clothes.

around 10am I do get a couple hours of bliss when Mom came over to visit. We haven't seen her in a couple weeks so it was a pleasant surprise. She stayed and held Jack and had lunch with us.

Then we put Hugo down for a nap and my headache and I are very excited at the thought of a nap. Well Jack basically screams until Hugo wakes up. Arrrrgh.

Shawn is an angel and fixes the broken disposal, thanks babe.

We get bored

The kids get to go to Mimi's for a little bit while I get to go to mutual. Unfortunately I just sat around for a couple hours in the mad heat until I decide I'm just going to bail.

I come home, kids fuss, Lacy wont go to bed... yada yada yada now its 12:43 and I am once again up with a gassy fussy baby.

So there it is, my complaining for the day.

Now for the bragging and possibly TMI.
A couple hours ago I handed the fussy baby over, not feeling guilty at all and stomp to the bedroom to shower and get ready for bed.
About 2 seconds later I return, probably to complain about something else when Shawn says he needs me. He then pulls me onto his lap and kisses me all passionately and tells me how beautiful and sexy I am.
Now when I looked in the mirror today I did not feel so. When he pulled me onto his lap all I could think about was the way I was positioned accentuated my horrid muffin tops. But Shawn makes me feel so good and so loved. I know he means it when he says it. He has never made me feel like his attraction is conditional.
Like, you'll be sexy when...
you aren't pregnant anymore
you loose the baby weight
your hair grows longer
you put on make-up
you dress up
you aren't wearing your grungies
He makes me honestly believe that he thinks I am beautiful no matter what. I can only hope that all the wives/women I know and love has felt that kind of love from a man. It is the most wonderful feeling to know that no matter how crappy you feel someone will always think you are beautiful and mean it.

Even though I'm terribly tired and my head is pounding, I guess today was a good day after all.


Tina said...

Jenny you are too darling!! I miss seeing you're cute face. Maybe some evening or weekend I can come by and say hi and hold your cute baby??

Kristin Hamblin said...

I feel your pain with the no clothes fitting. I love being pregnant but hate the 6 months after that it takes to get my body back. I think you look great for having a 3 week old! I could totally relate to your post about yesterday. Madelyn has finally had 3 good nights in a row when she is not up crying for hours on end. Hopefully just a few weeks and Jack will be sleeping better too. Let me know if you need anything!

Janine said...

Can I tell you that sometimes we need TMI. It is nice to know that there is another mother feeling like me somewhere else in this world. It is also nice to know that this mother is one of my dearest friends. I have felt and still feel as you do on certain days. Sometimes when the clothes are too tight and Mya is screaming and Tim isn't looking at me with that twinkle in his eye and I feel terrible about myself and life really...those are the days I want to hide under my covers and become invisible for just a moment. I want you to know that you are beautiful. Nothing short of it. I am so glad that Shawn is a stellar husband. He makes me love him more and more. And I am just a friend. Your kids continue to get cuter and cuter and I are the luckiest. I love you. I hope happier days continue to be in your path.

Clarissa Jo Baxter said...

I am so happy for you! What a sweet husband! This so so wonderful! And its never TIM to brag/share the love of your relationship! Im so happy for you!

Susan Jo said...

Shawn is a good man and you are a good woman. Don't forget it.

Brewer Family said...

Ah you have such a good husband! Thats how Stanley is too and I am so grateful, because being pregnant and the time after doesn't make me feel beautiful. Thank goodness for great husbands!