It may be TMI but its my blog, so get over it!
Oh and its going to be a long, rambling post. I deserve that every once in a while, right?
First of all, my husband totally loves me.
Second of all, today was a crappy day!
but I am going to blog in the reverse order. save the best for last
Last night at 1:30 (or I guess that was this morning) I decided to go out in the family room because Jack was screaming with some gas and Shawn and I figured if he got some sleep, he could wake up with the kids and let me sleep in. Between Jack and thinking about Susan (read here if you don't know what I am talking about) I didn't sleep at all! Well around 4:30am, I was still on the couch with a fussy baby and Shawn gets a call and has to go to work. Ahhh, that's definitely not a good start to the day. Not the working thing, the no-sleep thing.
Then I had a melt-down getting ready. I know its only been 3 weeks and I shouldn't be fretting but none of my clothes fit! Everything is too tight, nothing looks or feels good or right. And I have tons of grey hair!! (random... I know) Plus we have no no money to buy any clothes.
around 10am I do get a couple hours of bliss when Mom came over to visit. We haven't seen her in a couple weeks so it was a pleasant surprise. She stayed and held Jack and had lunch with us.
Then we put Hugo down for a nap and my headache and I are very excited at the thought of a nap. Well Jack basically screams until Hugo wakes up. Arrrrgh.
Shawn is an angel and fixes the broken disposal, thanks babe.
We get bored
The kids get to go to Mimi's for a little bit while I get to go to mutual. Unfortunately I just sat around for a couple hours in the mad heat until I decide I'm just going to bail.
I come home, kids fuss, Lacy wont go to bed... yada yada yada now its 12:43 and I am once again up with a gassy fussy baby.
So there it is, my complaining for the day.
Now for the bragging and possibly TMI.
A couple hours ago I handed the fussy baby over, not feeling guilty at all and stomp to the bedroom to shower and get ready for bed.
About 2 seconds later I return, probably to complain about something else when Shawn says he needs me. He then pulls me onto his lap and kisses me all passionately and tells me how beautiful and sexy I am.
Now when I looked in the mirror today I did not feel so. When he pulled me onto his lap all I could think about was the way I was positioned accentuated my horrid muffin tops. But Shawn makes me feel so good and so loved. I know he means it when he says it. He has never made me feel like his attraction is conditional.
Like, you'll be sexy when...
you aren't pregnant anymore
you loose the baby weight
your hair grows longer
you put on make-up
you dress up
you aren't wearing your grungies
He makes me honestly believe that he thinks I am beautiful no matter what. I can only hope that all the wives/women I know and love has felt that kind of love from a man. It is the most wonderful feeling to know that no matter how crappy you feel someone will always think you are beautiful and mean it.
Even though I'm terribly tired and my head is pounding, I guess today was a good day after all.